It’s the first day of spring, I can finally show off my calves. They’ve been cooped up in the stable all winter.
I’m so sick of studying I’m going to drop out and start a literary themed Turkish flat bread shop called Pide and Prejudice.
Champagne tastes on a drink my friends beer while they’re in the bathroom budget.
I’m pretty sure the reason I don’t have any tattoos is because I’m still not sure if I want to become a famous actor or the president.
Yesterday at a wedding myself and a couple of other lactose intolerant people were standing around the cheese table bitching about how good the cheese looked then someone said “wait, I have those tablets in the car” so we all went ham on lactase enzyme dietary supplements and expensive cheese. It was amazing, bless that stranger.
Half French Half New yorker dismissing someone: baguette about it!
Treat yourself like Olivia Benson from Law and Order SVU expects you to be treated.
Today at the train station a guy was handing out pamphlets for “brisbanes tallest stair climb”. I took one and then immediately tripped over some steps so I don’t think I’m available that weekend.